It's soooooo Hard to say Goodbye, to a GREAT class!!!!

Over the past 8weeks, we have all had the opportunity to engage, learn, and encourage one another. This class has been very interesting, because it was about something that we all do each and everyday but in different methods. When thinking about communicating with one another, you mainly just think about creating a dialogue if back and forth statements and or questions. You rarely think about executing "effective communication skills"

Thank you to each and every one of you for your encouraging words and positivity that you all have shown throughout the class. I pray that everybody continues to strive through the last few classes and successfully complete this program.

I can be reached at Sherrell.widgeon@waldenu.edu or personal email Relly810@yahoo.com

Thanks Again,
Sherrell

Adjoining- Group Project/Meeting

During my undergrad, one of my professors assigned the class into groups of 8/9 people. We were given the task of coming up with a devastating event and to report on it. The details that we were supposed to include was the location, how devastating was it, how many people did it affect/kill, what did the people do as of a result of it, and what were some suggestions on how people could've been better prepared. There were many roles to be handeled; such as research all the information, document and outline it online in the discussion board so your fellow group members could view as well, and type the whole paper up. The last role was a collaborative part of answering any questions from other groups and or the professor.

A few of my classmates lived in or near the surrounding area, so they were able to provide detailed information. A few of the negative interactions that took place were, not everbody participated in the actual research of the information, not did everybody participate in reviewing each part and finalizing the main paper. A few classmates popped in every 2/3 days, i'm not sure for what since they didn't provided any useful information. Nevertheless when peer evaluations came around, everybody "expected" a good report. However, some classmates were let down when they received theirs and it wasn't what they thought it would be!

At the beginning of the group I announced to my partners on the group's discussion that I'd be leaving to go on vacation midway through the week; however I would have all of my assigned work completed and submitted for them to have and include in the report for when it was turned in. I also emailed my teacher letting her know of my preplanned absence beginning on that Thursday throughout the next week (I was going on a cruise). So the beginning of the week went as normal with assigning roles and splitting up areas for research, deciding what day and times would be best to meet on the discussion board and compile all that we had found thus far, etc. Before I left, there were three discussions announced; the first three/nine people logged on, second nobody showed up except me and one other student, and third was rescheduled because everybody had posted that it was a bad time. So needless to say they had about 2 or 3 more after I left. However, during the second meeting of me and one other I posted and "attached" my whole findings and gave permission to make any corrections or add-ins that they felt necessary, but pretty much that was my work. I came back from vacation and checked my grade, to my surprise I had received an "D" for the class. After emailing and the professor and checking over the group's evaluation report they had reported that I barely attended any meetings and I did not deliver nor produce any work in assisting with the project. I was shocked but I knew I had done so and would not stop until it was proven. I sent the professor the attachment and also I had him take a look at my groups discussion board where I posted my work. What apparently happened was, they used my work as if they found It themselves and not given me credit for delivering it ahead of time, thinking since I wouldn't be there during peer evaluations I wouldn't notice. Needless to say, everything was in black and white and my grade became changed to an "A".

I think one think that could be improved is communication apprehension, so if there is someone who doesn't feel comfortable reporting or speaking/sharing their information in fron of others, they can email there portion to another student and he/she can then post it. (O'Hair & Weimann, 2012 ) That was the worst group I had ever worked with, so the adjoining process was easy for me, because I never ever wanted to work with either one of them again. I had lost all trust for them, even if we ended up in another class together, it would be strictly about classwork.

Resource
O'Hair, D. & Wiemann, M. (2012) Real Communication

Week 5- Conflict

Think about any disagreements, or conflicts, you have recently experienced or are currently experiencing at work with a supervisor or colleague, or someone in your personal life. Share at least two strategies you have learned about that might help you manage or resolve the conflict more productively, and why these strategies might be effective. For example, could you suggest a compromise? Could you look for a broader range of solutions to your disagreement? Could you use some of the principles of nonviolent communication or the 3 R's to better help you resolve this conflict?

- My last disagreement was with  my 2nd supervisor in charge. She constantly comes into my classroom and tells me "I'm not doing something right". I have come to the understanding and realization that prior to me being hired, that was her classroom, so she hasn't fully detached herself from the class. She constantly wants me to leave everything in the same place as when she had the class, and to do things her way. Which I absolutely refuse because I am my own person with my own style. I had this conversation with her on more than one occasion, what worked for you over the last 20years, may not work for me with the new children. I was next told that I never complete any of my paper work on time and need to do a better job as the lead teacher. My first reaction is to be aggressive and to protect my character. After expressing that paperwork gets completed when time is available, she decides she doesn't like my answer, and said no it's because I make excuse after excuse. Well I take offense to that especially when I tell her each day Oh, the internet is out again, or can you put coverage into my class so I can go into the hallway and work on paperwork, or oh the fact that I've had 5new children within the past week and half on top of 2 constant all day children who cry nonstop. I then realized since she's not understanding my point of view nor is sensitive to my struggle, I then ask for assistance without being aggressive nor making facial expressions. One suggestion that was given is to either find or make time to get it done, everybody else does. I think said my last statement and went quiet. Which was, I refuse to take work home because I am not on the clock and nothing we(teachers) do are ever appreciated. Then I got another lecture on how "effective" teachers do things such as; take work home, and how one of her good friends does it all the time. I sat at the table with my hands folded and listened. I'm reminded from week 2 or 3 that in order to become an "effective communicator, you must be an effective listener", and from that point on I had nothing left to say!

Also, if appropriate, ask your colleagues for their input and advice regarding, if not specific problems, how they have learned to be more effective communicators as it relates to conflict resolution skills.

- Asking one of my coworkers from my classroom about how she communicates. She said at the beginning she asks for whatever it is that she wants and if it is not provided then she becomes very aggressive, irate, and remind them that they have done it for someone else and they going to do it for her as well. She states that while she knows being unruly doesn't help, but sometimes she feels that she is taken advantage of when she doesn't stand her ground. I asked her for instance how does she communicate when speaking to professional leaders. She said it's almost as if she goes into a little shell and only responds when a question has been asked to her.

My Communication and Listening Skills

During week four, we were asked to answer three assessments as well as having others perform the same assessments about us. The assessments were; Communication Anxiety Inventory, Verbal Aggressiveness Scale, and Listening Styles Profile. From taking these assessments, I learned a lot about myself and how I communicate and listen which is something we cannot judge on a normal basis.

My communication Anxiety shows that i'm in the middle of feeling concerned about some communication situations but not all of them. Verbal Aggressiveness showed that I can be argumentative and at times I can attack another person's character. The Listening Profile showed that I am very concerned about other's feelings and at times it can work against me because I put too much trust in others.

For the most part my other evaluators hit right on with the verbal and listening styles profile, and slightly off for the communication. They said they noticed me as uneasy in some communication situations but definitely not in all. I definitely agree with the Listening Styles Profile. I can tend to be very argumentative if I feel that my character or knowledge is being challenged. I know in the long run that it needs to be turned down a bit, but I just can't allow people to misrepresent me especially if I am present at a meeting.

Communication

• Do you find yourself communicating differently with people from different groups and cultures?
• If yes, in what ways do you communicate differently?

-It all depends on what group of people I am speaking too. If I am at work and speaking to my supervisor or parents, then I'm speaking professional and making sure that all my sentences are grammatically correct. I also make sure that I'm making eye contact and not speaking the whole time with my hands.

On the other hand, if I'm speaking to other colleagues and or family and friends then I am a little more relaxed with my speaking habits. I may use my hands to describe something, I may not always remember to allow the other person to go back and forth in the conversation. Speaking with this group of people is more relaxed than it is when speaking to parents and or supervisors.

Based on what you have learned this week, share at least three strategies you could use to help you communicate more effectively with the people or groups you have identified.
- The first strategy is to get to know and become familiar with the people or groups that I am speaking too. "Try to withhold judgment long enough to gain a deeper understanding than first impression allows" (Gonzalez, Mena- J. 2010).
- The second strategy is to determine or identify what the communication is going to be about. "Men are more likely to report; while women are more likely to establish rapport" (BeeBee, S.A & BeeBee, S.J & Redmond, M.V 2010)
- The third strategy is to "designate rules that are associated with social rules until they are broken" (Vockovic, A. 2008).



Resources

Gonzalez, Mena- J. (2010). 50 Strategies to communicating and working with diverse families. Upper Saddle River, NJ: Pearson Education, Inc.

BeeBee, S.A & BeeBee, S.J & Redmond, M.V (2010). Interpersonal communication: Relating to others (6th ed.) Boston, MA: Allyn & Bacon

Vockovic, A. (2008) Multicultural Education and Technology Journal, 2(1), 47-59
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The Six Little McGhees

The show that I decided to watch was The 6 little McGhees on the OWN Network.

No Sound:

What do you think the characters' relationships are based on the ways in which they are communicating?

What are they feeling and expressing based on the nonverbal behavior you are observing?

-  The mom and dad were in the kitchen having a conversation. Both of them were displaying very unique facial expressions, so to me it looks like they were having a very intense conversation. The next clip was the family went to a store to try on bathing suits and swims shoes. The dad could be seen pointing to each child and pointing to the ground as in he was telling each one of them to sit down. The lady from the back brought out a stack of shoes, in which the children got up and started running, crying, and i'm assuming yelling.


With Sound:

What assumptions did you make about the characters and plot based on the ways in which you interpreted the communication you observed?

        Would your assumptions have been more correct if you had been watching a show you know well?

- The mom and dad were in the kitchen having a conversation about getting their children swim lessons. The mom had went and registered the children at the YMCA, and was relaying the information to her husband that she had received from the aquatics director. In regards to 2year olds receiving swim lessons, they must participate in the "mommy/daddy and me class; which means that each child must be in the water with an adult. Well being that they have 6 children and only them 2, they became frustrated about who could they call on to help them out each sunday, when most of their friends are in church.  When the family went to the store, the dad was having the kids feet measured while the mom was in another area of the store picking out swim suits. The children became reckless and began running around the store and becoming little terrors as they tour the store into pieces. I think my assumptions would have been more clear and in full detail had I known what the facial expressions and the conversation was about.

Effective Communication Behaviors

For your blog this week, think of someone (e.g., family member, celebrity, politician, friend, or professor) who demonstrates competent communication within a particular context. What behaviors does this person exhibit that make him or her effective? Would you want to model some of your own communication behaviors after this person? Why or why not?

The one person who demonstrates competent communication is my father. I selected him outta array of other individuals because I deem him to be the most effective helpful person. Some behaviors that my father exhibits; are great listener, sympathetic, knowledgeable on many subjects, always willing to help, and has great advice.

For example during my first year of college, my father "told" me that when I begin getting my refund checks from my student loans, that I would send them back immediately. Being a first year college student I didn't understand why I had to give this money back right away; in the same manner that I saw all my other friends going across the street to the mall and going shopping. He explained to me, that in the long run when it comes time to having to pay my loans back that I will already have a head start and will not have fell behind. Trying it his way, I then noticed when the statements came, I was actually ahead of my payments. Had I not had my father to guide me in submitting what was right and not being careless, I would have been behind and possibly messed up my credit.

I would like to model some of my own communication behaviors after my father, with listening because some people just need somebody to listen to them and not provide any comments or criticisms. I also would like to be more sympathetic, because even if I can't be successful in helping, I can at least try.